Staying the course
By Elena Milam
I thought my freshman season was going to be special.
But COVID had other plans, as it did for so many people.
It’s six years later, and my career has been a whirlwind ever since.
Yep, I’m a ‘six-year grandma’, and I’ve been here at DePaul the whole time.
In a world where the transfer portal is more active than ever, I want athletes to know it’s okay to stay if you love where you’re at.
When I arrived at DePaul, I, like most freshmen, had lofty expectations to start and win – big fish, small pond vibes.
That wasn’t my story, but by practicing patience, I’ve become a better player.
So before I finish my final season, let me tell you how I got here…
COVID Year
I’ll never forget my first season at DePaul.
It was 2020, and we were all ready for a big spring season.
We had a game scheduled against the Chicago Red Stars, which was going to be a great experience for us.
But then COVID hit, and everything changed.
We got a bunch of emails and instructions from the school, and five days later, we left the dorms.
It was a crazy time, but looking back, I’m grateful for the opportunity to be with my family and take a break from the grind of college soccer.
When we returned to campus, we quarantined in the dorms for two weeks, which was not a lot of fun.
We ate boxed lunches delivered to our door and legitimately couldn’t leave our rooms.
When the schedule resumed, albeit adjusted with many safety protocols, we felt grateful to play but acknowledged it wasn’t nearly the same experience, especially for our seniors.
The rest of the season was a bit of a blur, but it reminded me how much this game means to my life and how strange it feels to not be able to play.
A Breakout Season
My junior year was when things really started to click for me.
We had a new coach, Michele O’Brien, and she brought in a new goalkeeper coach, Kathleen Duwve.
Coach Duwve kicked my butt every day in practice.
She found a way to get me so ‘passionate’ that I unlocked a new level of intensity guarding the goal.
“Okay,” she’d say, unbothered. “Just don’t let me score on you.”
I didn’t let her.
Together, we spent my junior season grinding out the details to strengthen my athleticism. Duwve knew I needed to improve my conditioning, so we’d go for runs together before practice.
She did a good job of gently showing me I wasn’t as good as I thought I was, so we targeted my weaker skills.
I think our relationship can set a good example for younger athletes who want more guidance from their coaches. It’s important to acknowledge the little moments coaches take to help you.
Even if they’re offering constructive criticism you don’t want to hear, it’s still a valuable learning experience.
A lot of athletes feel left out when their coaches don’t say anything to them at practice, but they usually are talking to you, if you listen.
“You didn’t do this thing well today,” really means, “Hey, I believe in you, and I’m telling you this to help you improve.”
In my story, the listening paid off, after a lot of patience.
I finally started getting some playing time in my senior year, and I made the most of it.
I’ll never forget my first start against Stanford. I was shaking so hard, trying to keep my composure.
I ended up playing pretty well, but mid-way through the season, I struggled a bit, and I didn’t see the field the rest of my season.
Soccer giveth and taketh away sometimes.
As goalkeepers, we play under a magnifying glass; we’re often remembered for our mistakes more than saves.
But again, Coach Duwve stepped in to help me reset.
Every setback is an opportunity to get better, so once I got over myself, I put my head down and got back to work.
Thankfully, I had a couple of seasons left.
As goalkeepers, we play under a magnifying glass; we’re often remembered for our mistakes more than saves. But again, Coach Duwve stepped in to help me reset. Every setback is an opportunity to get better, so once I got over myself, I put my head down and got back to work.
Starting Over
Last season was a lot of fun.
I was starting and played in every game.
It was a great feeling to be out there with my teammates, competing at the highest level.
We didn’t make it to the Big East tournament, which was disappointing, but I’m still really proud of what we were able to accomplish.
This fall, we’re on a mission to prove everyone wrong.
We want to channel that chip on our shoulders into momentum in our conference matches.
With graduation on the horizon, I’m focusing on learning and growing from every detail of every game. I want to play professionally, so each mistake or save is preparation for my future.
In a time when so many players are entering the transfer portal, I’ve always been committed to DePaul.
My team and coaches never gave up on me, so I won’t give up on them.
I’m so grateful for the opportunity to represent this university, and I’m going to give it my all the rest of this season.
Let’s make this one to remember.
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